Friday, December 5, 2008

I'm Twisted

Am I sick and demented? I know Karin calls me a morbid perv, but I think I may be demented too.

I am so excited because this weekend... I'm cleaning house. I have a whole weekend where I don't have to go anywhere or do anything and I am going to clean my dirty house.

Lovingly sweep and mop all the floors, scrub the tile, vacuum, do laundry, re-arrange the furniture (probably move the Christmas tree).
And hopefully wash both of the dogs... and I will think about the cat, but I'm not brave enough to EVER wash that monster again. I take him to the groomers and they call me and tell me to come and get him every time. He He.

I think in one of his past lives he had an unfortunate run in with a blow dryer because they have to put him in a cage dryer and he hisses and howls and screams until they finally give up.

He's so funny. He will come and sit on the side of the tub while I shower, stick his head in and look at me like, "Um, hey, mom... did you realize there is like water falling ALL over you?" Then he gets this disgusted look and moves to the sink so I don't accidentally on purpose splash him. But as soon as I pull out the trusty old hair dryer he's gone. Like I can't find him again until it is safely back in the closet.

My black lab, he just wants to get in the shower with me. He's a water dog. A big dumb water dog. And with the whole double coat thing, I can't really blow dry him (plus, have you ever tried to blow dry a 100 pound dog? I mean, seriously!). He'd probably sit there and let me do it, but I don't have four hours to try.

Then there is the baby. Bear is our 5 month old Shih Tzu. He is a mess. I don't have the slightest idea what I was thinking when I decided I wanted a long haired little lap dog. I have to brush his fluffy butt all the time. He needs bathed twice a day, I swear, not happening. And he is a litter box muncher. I can't keep him out of it.
If I move the litter box, the cat can't find it... he's getting up there in years, it is sad. We've yelled, we've put things in the way, we've tried everything. He loves him some cat poop. Just ewww.

Wow, that was a long ramble on the pets. But now back to the original thought I was having (some days it is incredibly hard to keep up). I get to clean house and that is making me VERY happy. Our extended house guest is moving the last of his stuff out this weekend, so I can clean out our guest bedroom and hopefully we can take some of the Christmas decoration boxes back to storage and I can get the office back in shape.
See, this just makes my day. I am sick.

Oh! Oh! Maybe I can even get the dishes done!

2 comments:

Travis Erwin said...

I got bored enough to bathe my dog yesterday. He wasn't pleased.

huddlekay said...

Sounds like your feeling much better... Much more like the morbid pervy Crystal that I know and love :)