So, over at 3WW, today's words are: Avenge, Genuine, Ramble.
Here is my attempt with those three. A little dark, a little mysterious, possibly a good start to my next MS. I like this one, and had a great time writing it!
The need to avenge his sister’s murder was a genuine rage under his skin, biting and burning, until it led to his ramble around the park. Searching for the monster that killed her, night after night, brought him some measure of relief from the pain and anger, but nothing eased the guilt that ate at his gut. It was his fault she was dead. His fault she’d been wandering around after dark, crying, drunk. It was his fault someone had attacked her and left her to bleed to death, laying on the path near the rhododendrons. If he hadn’t told her the man she thought was her father, the man that raised her and loved her, wasn’t really her father, she wouldn’t have left to go have a drink or two at the bar. She’d been smart enough to know she couldn’t drive herself home, but not smart enough to call a cab. She’d been easy prey for the thief, or rapist or murderer. Whatever you want to call him. The mud caked in her nostrils said he forced her face down in the flowerbed, the torn clothing said he forced himself on her, and the fact that her wallet was missing said he forced her to give it to him, or maybe he’d just taken it after he stabbed her. It didn’t matter now. Once he found the monster that killed his sister, it would be over. All the pain, all the rage, all the guilt. He’d take care of it all.
Face-Lift 1483
2 days ago
10 comments:
A powerful tale. Enjoyed that.
wow! That story is defiantly isn't finished! hehehe.
Hmm. Didn't know about 3WW. I'll have to give it a try. Yours sounds like a grand beginning.
Love the "all the guilt" Puts it into perspective
Very haunting
Walk hard and carry a big . . .gun? No it's good. I like it. Dark and brooding!
Pain-filled and gut wrenching...you definitely drew me in!
There is something here to flush out further. Tense, tight writing. And you know me, I love to paint with a wide brush and dark paint.
Way to go! Great short...
This does sound like a good start for something longer!
"...his skin, biting and burning." Excellent wording and the whole short leaves me wanting to know where it's headed.
Post a Comment